Raya will definitely be different this year. I’m definitely sad that I won’t be able to visit my extended family because of the pandemic, but there are certain aspects of the traditional visit that I wasn’t such a fan of.
There will be uncles and aunties who will ask really nosy questions and you can’t really run away from them or make any excuses to leave the room. While it is least likely to happen this year, there’s still a chance for them to pop up with a question you don’t know how to answer—even through a video call.
Netflix gave us a few flash cards to help us figure out what to say just in case you need to deal with those questions in your Raya video calls. If you have a printer at home, save these and print them out in case you need a quick reference for a snappy comeback. The flash cards are also pretty enough to keep!
When they weigh in on your physical appearance
If they comment on your weight through a video call, you can either blame the unflattering angle, or take advice from “The King: Eternal Monarch” and threaten a beheading. The latter feels more dramatic, but go with your gut.
If you really don’t want to deal with the ‘Where do you work?” question
You can take cues from “Tiger King” star Joe Exotic and boast about how brave you are, and you could even go on a tangent about your new country album. Distraction is always key.
If you’ve just graduated but job prospects have been tough, especially during this pandemic
They have no business asking, but if you really couldn’t fake a bad connection might I suggest quoting Park Saeroyi from “Itaewon Class”? In fact, in this day and age it’s good to have an optimistic quote handy. This flash card will make for a good printout.
If they think you’re making the wrong career choice
Sure, they might have your best interest in mind, but you know your own interest best. This quote from “Crash Landing On You” isn’t a snappy comeback, but rather a phrase that could help them understand you don’t need to work for Kak Intan.
When you want to wear something nice for the Raya video call and you’re being attacked
Can’t I wear sequins without it being a big deal, Kak Marini? If you’re going to face this question, follow in Madam C.J. Walker’s footsteps and tell them that you aren’t planning to stop climbing that career ladder.
If they ask if you’ve got a girlfriend/boyfriend
A dreaded question for the unmarried adults, you might think that this is a yes or no question. But it’s a trap designed to either talk about marriage, or have them talk about their friend’s auntie’s nephew’s kid who might be ‘perfect for you’.
If you said ‘Yes’ to the previous question and it made things worse
You don’t even want to think about marriage but here we are. Having this quote from ‘Khabi Khushi Khabi Gham’ can be a handy reminder than you don’t need the pressure from your extended family to get to you.
When they’re just being too nosy and it’s a bit too personal
I personally think that this is the most inappropriate question to ask anyone. Maybe it’s not easy for them to have children, and maybe they can’t afford to have them. There are a lot of reasons to why couples don’t have kids and people should keep this question to themselves.
But if you come across this question, by all means, copy Jughead from ‘Riverdale’, or just talk about ‘Riverdale’ and ignore the question.
If your younger family members are asking for ‘duit raya’
You can excuse yourself by saying you can’t give any this year because you aren’t face to face. Copy Shrek and cheer them up saying ‘maybe next year’. But if they pass you their bank or eWallet details, I’m sorry I can’t help you.
In case you’ve been hoarding too much stuff and need to clear some space when you’re spring cleaning
Grab the item you aren’t sure of and hold onto it whilst closing your eyes. Do you feel happy, or do you feel indifferent? If you feel ‘joy’ while holding the item, keep it. But if you feel a bit ‘meh’, throw it out.
I hope these flash cards could help you deal with any surprising questions and situations when you’re video calling your family during Raya. Let me know of your own tips on what to say for the above questions, too!